It's spring here, or at least that what humans call it. Which really means the snow is gone and you're tripping over flowers. My hive is covered with them.
Things have been slow but they seem to be getting busier? Kurloz started a market. And a confessional. And he's still teaching me and a few others how to sign. I think it'd be good for talking to Zefur eventually. When they learn. They chirp but don't really speak. They're also getting taller which is unacceptable. Growing up from tough situations is a mental things but appurrently gods translate things a little more literally.
I've been trying out various things to get some paint again but I've not found as much as I'd like. I have bundles of flowers drying now to see if I can grind them up into powder. Not that my house needs more painting but I like it. There's at least three of us who do artistic things.
Kurloz is...a little diffurent now but maybe you should talk to him about that? Zephyr did a thing with frogs and they had a weird effect. It's not bad, I purromise, just different. It's something I think you should probably talk about. Imagine I kissed your forehead there. Though I suspect you are also getting taller now without me. I am doomed to be surrounded by tall people. We have to talk your matesprit into staying a reasonable height.
The thing with the frogs though? It made me remember a lot of things. Not things I'd forgotten really, just, made them all more vivid. I miss everyone. I miss Signless most of all. I just really wish I had one of my quadrants. No one really appeals in another quadrant here. It's a little lonely that way. We don't have many trolls and those we do are quadranted or just not for me. It's frustrating sometimes.I guess a human could do for red in a pinch, but, once again, all quadranted. Appurently another version of me was here before and red with a human version of Signless? But we both left. There's also another version of myself some of the others knew before they came to the Meadous. She has a different hatchname, not Meulin at all. I don't remember it off the top of my head but it's weird. A little unsettling to know I'm in so many places. I'd rather it just be me. I got off topic. I just miss Signless really. It's not like I need a new quadrant when I really just miss the ones not here. At least I know you're within writing distance, even if we can't meet right now.
I'm sure you understand that. It's annoying to know you're physically so close but the walls have to stay up and so we can't get to you. I'm not sure why the walls have to stay up but...I don't think Zephyr would do it for no reason. They treat us better than that.
I hope you're okay. I hope everything is okay. Tell me how you are. Tell me how things go with that learning to face your fears little god. Don't eat the flowers.
TEREZI. my sister sweet. OH PITEOUS PARTED. how i mother fuckin long for thee. ALL THE THINGS WE HADN'T TIME TO SHARE. talk. TOUCH. tastes sweet of your kiss. AND NOW ONLY WRIT. simply ain't enough, i know well, even as i've only got to begun.
A STRANGE SORT TOO. never written to no one like this. LETTERS OF EMPIRICAL ORDER AIN'T MUCH THE SAME AND SHIP CORRESPONDANCE CAME FAR QUICKER, EVEN FOR ITS FAULTS. mirth, even board writ has a feel a sorts different. DIFFERENCE IN TIDAL SEA TO RIVER FLOW. all beasts alike ain't feasting same, as is said.
I WISH TO ASK OF ALL. every piece given be more i may hold of thee. MY BELOVED. what occurences have made abouts? WHOM HAS HELD YOU A COMPATRIOT? what wonders have you seen? WHAT MIRACLES DO YOU DREAM ON? i've missed you. I'VE MISSED YOU SO DAMN MUCH.
conversed did i with a zephyr. IT MAY BE SO WE MAY ONE DAY MEET AGAIN. the when, however, remains elusive. I HOPE IT SOON. i pray. I WISH. i shall need to make writ all the more to bide until then. WRIT AND ALL GIFT I CAN MUSTER. piece and piece of heart until you may rebuild me where you are honk honk. :o)
OH MIRTH, TEREZI, I MISS YOU SO. it aches within me, the longing for you. A BITTERSWEET SORT IS THIS. like prayers of mercy met but still injury to bear. ONLY JUST BEYOND ARE YOU, YET STILL. do you recall the rings we wore? THE RING OF SKULLS YOU GIFTED ALSO? i have kept both with me, treasued, that i may have you nearer.
TO PREACH OF MYSELF, MUST GIVE ADMITTANCE UNTO A QUIET HERE. so different of alternia and the capitol. AND YET I WOULD NEVER NAME IT WITHOUT NO TRIAL AT ALL. merely a slower pace and one allowing of healing.
I HAVE MADE AMMENDS IN MANY A WAY. i sought forgiveness with a brother, peter, whom i lashed out for calling of my speach. HE'S A GOOD MOTHERFUCKER, I THINK, HE JUST AIN'T SEE IT YET. i hope he shall. HOPE HIS FEARS OF ME EASE.
waspfire also. MAY HAVE STIRRED SOMETHING AWFUL BY A SISTER. she was dragging up what was being past of xanthous. THE SINS OF MY FUTURE. couldn't be about it and made ill. BUT I THINK WE GOT SET NOW AS I'M NOT TO BE DOING SUCH THINGS NO MORE.
terezi, the sister truth living here by me, came abouts apologetic. FORGAVE OF COURSE. wasn't a thing up at all. STILL, SHE THINKS BEST HER LEAVE. wish she wouldn't. WISH SHE'D STAY. promised she could leave and i would bide by it. WOULD WAIT. tears at me some but such as things go.
XANTHOUS, MY BROTHER. he has sought ammend of his own soul. HE HAS RETURNED HIS SCARS OF OLD AND MADE NEW OF THEM. a macabre sort but. AS AM I. as are we. HE SEEMS HAPPIER OF THEM AND SO I ALSO.
i have sought to keep peace within the meadous here. I HAVE MADE ABOUTS MYSELF TO ACTING LIASON WHERE I MAY NEED. perhaps i ain't best suited. PERHAPS IT ALL SOMETHING MUCH. but i wanted, i suppose. I WANT THIS.
it has made me think of the signless. IT HAS MADE ME MISS HIM ALSO. but not only for that.
I DID SOMETHING. zephyr blessed many an amiphimemorial upon our lot the winter passed. MERE TOUCH AND ALL SO MANY A THING RETURNED. understand for some and all it was different. WOULD'VE ANTICIPATED A HARSHNESS CERTAIN HAD I KNOWN. should've got to guess.
YET IN MY MIND A MEMORY. my self spread the fuck through in briefest taste. I SOUGHT MORE, DID I. my brother. ME. us and we making up for one. I REMEMBERED, SISTER. in recollection before me lay beforus.
OH TEREZI. it was beautiful. A MOTHER FUCKIN MIRACLE UNDENIABLE. i recalled us all. TWELVE AS YOURS WAS TWELVE. friends as you all were friends. AND A PEACE. dear meulin. MY MOIRAIL. was so different then. SUCH A STRANGE SENSE IT BRINGS. to be fit together yet missing too all the same. PERHAPS SIMILAR IN SENSE OF BEING BITTERSWEET.
similar in view of stars above. ALL CAME TOGETHER RECENT, TALE AND IMAGE FOR ZEPHYR TO MAKE OF THE SKY. meulin made a cat, warm and reminding of her. XANTHOUS GOT ABOUT HIM CURSE IN STARS ABOVE, BRINGING ALL HUMOR. i made a feath of stars. MADE SYMBOLIC ALL THEM WHAT HELPED ME. all them missed. ZEPHYR TOOK FAVOR, ME AND A BERTIE. i was gifted sleep free of daymare by way of wrist piece. A STAR WORN UPON ME. has allowed me to dream sweet it has, something done on never before.
I DREAMT OF OUR STARS, BACKWAYS OF THE CAPITOL. i dreamt of yours and of mine. I DREAMT US MEETING THERE. i dreamt us all but me and you particular. I HOPE TO SEE YOU THEN COME SUNRISE. or maybe after. CAN'T PAINT THE VIEW WITHOUT STAYING ON FOR IT, DON'T YOU KNOW.
pity you dearly.
KURLOZ. ♑
[A painted sunrise has been included. Terezi is featured by a familiar silhouette.]
[He'd intended to write as soon as Di gave him the idea. He'd gone about it near jubilant, paper ready, writing bit set the fuck up.
And then he'd thought about her and all what she might say. He thought about her getting mad. And so he walked off and forgot about writing for a little while. Then a longer while.
But now he's back and he's staring at the paper and he braces like it's going to hurt him, like it'll be his blood and not ink as is needed to work miracle upon the paper.]
mY WiCkEd sIsTeR TeReZi,
I WaS DoInG AlL As wHaT YoU WaS AsKiNg, JuSt mInDiNg mY OwN OfF As fAr aS I CoUlD GeT, bUt tHeN ReAl rEcEnTlIkE, i wAs gEtTiNg tO Be wAkInG In tHiS PlAcE WhAt i aIn't wAsN'T SuPpOsEd tO Be bEiNg aT? aNd i fIgUrEd i oUgHt tO TeLl yOu bEcAuSe tHe sIsTeR As wHaT AiN'T NePeTa bUt iS BeInG HeR AnCeStOr gOt tElLiNg mE To. So, KnOw i'm aLl aBoUt gEtTiNg mY MoThErFuCkInG TeLl oN At yOu. ShE WaS KnOwInG AlL KiNdS Or mIrAcUlOuS ThInGs aS I WaSn't nEvEr tO Be kNoWiNg. ShE SaId sHe wAs bEiNg fRoM PaNeM ToO. aIn't tHaT AlL KiNdS Of mYsTiCaL HoW ThAt sHiT'S BeInG To wOrK?
AnYwAy, ShE WaS SaYiNg aS ThE MoThErFuCkEr yOu tOlD Me nOt tO Be sEeInG MiGhT WaNt tO Be sEeInG Me. I WaS LiKe, I CaN'T Be dOiNg tHaT, i aIn't bEiNg sUpPoSeD To bE. bUt tHeN ShE SaId hE WaS SaD AbOuT It aNd tHeN ShE GoT SaYiNg i sHoUlD TaLk tO YoU. aNd tHeN ThIs wAy tHiNgS Is mAyBe gEtTiNg tO AlL BeInG BeTtErLiKe. I HoPe sO. i wAnT To bE FrIeNdS AgAiN ReAl bAd, If tHaT'S OkAy wItH YoU.
EvErYoNe's rEaL NiCe hErE. i hOpE ThEy's bEiNg nIcE WhErE YoU'Re aT ToO. bEeN LoOkInG FoR A WaY As aLl tO KeEp yOu hApPy aS LiKe wHaT WaS WaNtEd oF YoU BuT I AiN'T FiGuReD It oUt yEt. I'M StIlL TrYiNg aT It.
Oh, AlSo, SiStEr sAiD FoR Me nOt tO Be eXpEcTiNg a lOt bUt i aIn't sUrE WhAt tHaT MeAnS ExAcT. iT'S A WhOlE LoT WhAt's hErE As i wAs nEvEr gEtTiNg eXpEcTaTiOnAl tO.
So, Uh, I'M GoNnA Be sEnDiNg tHiS At tO YoU NoW. hOnK.
I don't exactly know how to start this. I'm not even sure you want to hear from me. I haven't written to you even if I've been for half a year. Six, seven months? Maybe 8. I haven't kept strict track. But I've had a lot to think about lately.
I hope you're alright. And happy. I'm doing alright. I'm better, I think. I've really had a lot to think about but i have people to talk to. Ini, I mean Izzekiel told me you were somewhere out there. I guess I'm just sending this letter into the void. Alfie says his friend found his wife out beyond our world and they write. So I figure this might get to you.
I'm not sure what to say. I like it here. I don't know if I should. I feel a little guilty for liking it here.
I sail. I sail everywhere in the ocean which is really not anywhere at all. There nothing to find but a weird creature. I think I might change that. I have friends. No family but it asks a lot to have family. I've found someone I like. Not love, but like, and that seems like enough.
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codename_snapdragon) wrote2016-04-11 01:12 pm
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It's spring here, or at least that what humans call it. Which really means the snow is gone and you're tripping over flowers. My hive is covered with them.
Things have been slow but they seem to be getting busier? Kurloz started a market. And a confessional. And he's still teaching me and a few others how to sign. I think it'd be good for talking to Zefur eventually. When they learn. They chirp but don't really speak. They're also getting taller which is unacceptable. Growing up from tough situations is a mental things but appurrently gods translate things a little more literally.
I've been trying out various things to get some paint again but I've not found as much as I'd like. I have bundles of flowers drying now to see if I can grind them up into powder. Not that my house needs more painting but I like it. There's at least three of us who do artistic things.
Kurloz is...a little diffurent now but maybe you should talk to him about that? Zephyr did a thing with frogs and they had a weird effect. It's not bad, I purromise, just different. It's something I think you should probably talk about. Imagine I kissed your forehead there. Though I suspect you are also getting taller now without me. I am doomed to be surrounded by tall people. We have to talk your matesprit into staying a reasonable height.
The thing with the frogs though? It made me remember a lot of things. Not things I'd forgotten really, just, made them all more vivid. I miss everyone. I miss Signless most of all. I just really wish I had one of my quadrants. No one really appeals in another quadrant here. It's a little lonely that way. We don't have many trolls and those we do are quadranted or just not for me. It's frustrating sometimes.I guess a human could do for red in a pinch, but, once again, all quadranted. Appurently another version of me was here before and red with a human version of Signless? But we both left. There's also another version of myself some of the others knew before they came to the Meadous. She has a different hatchname, not Meulin at all. I don't remember it off the top of my head but it's weird. A little unsettling to know I'm in so many places. I'd rather it just be me. I got off topic. I just miss Signless really. It's not like I need a new quadrant when I really just miss the ones not here. At least I know you're within writing distance, even if we can't meet right now.
I'm sure you understand that. It's annoying to know you're physically so close but the walls have to stay up and so we can't get to you. I'm not sure why the walls have to stay up but...I don't think Zephyr would do it for no reason. They treat us better than that.
I hope you're okay. I hope everything is okay. Tell me how you are. Tell me how things go with that learning to face your fears little god. Don't eat the flowers.
<> Meulin
[Enclosed is a bundle of red and pink flowers]
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Feb-March
A STRANGE SORT TOO. never written to no one like this. LETTERS OF EMPIRICAL ORDER AIN'T MUCH THE SAME AND SHIP CORRESPONDANCE CAME FAR QUICKER, EVEN FOR ITS FAULTS. mirth, even board writ has a feel a sorts different. DIFFERENCE IN TIDAL SEA TO RIVER FLOW. all beasts alike ain't feasting same, as is said.
I WISH TO ASK OF ALL. every piece given be more i may hold of thee. MY BELOVED. what occurences have made abouts? WHOM HAS HELD YOU A COMPATRIOT? what wonders have you seen? WHAT MIRACLES DO YOU DREAM ON? i've missed you. I'VE MISSED YOU SO DAMN MUCH.
conversed did i with a zephyr. IT MAY BE SO WE MAY ONE DAY MEET AGAIN. the when, however, remains elusive. I HOPE IT SOON. i pray. I WISH. i shall need to make writ all the more to bide until then. WRIT AND ALL GIFT I CAN MUSTER. piece and piece of heart until you may rebuild me where you are honk honk. :o)
OH MIRTH, TEREZI, I MISS YOU SO. it aches within me, the longing for you. A BITTERSWEET SORT IS THIS. like prayers of mercy met but still injury to bear. ONLY JUST BEYOND ARE YOU, YET STILL. do you recall the rings we wore? THE RING OF SKULLS YOU GIFTED ALSO? i have kept both with me, treasued, that i may have you nearer.
TO PREACH OF MYSELF, MUST GIVE ADMITTANCE UNTO A QUIET HERE. so different of alternia and the capitol. AND YET I WOULD NEVER NAME IT WITHOUT NO TRIAL AT ALL. merely a slower pace and one allowing of healing.
I HAVE MADE AMMENDS IN MANY A WAY. i sought forgiveness with a brother, peter, whom i lashed out for calling of my speach. HE'S A GOOD MOTHERFUCKER, I THINK, HE JUST AIN'T SEE IT YET. i hope he shall. HOPE HIS FEARS OF ME EASE.
waspfire also. MAY HAVE STIRRED SOMETHING AWFUL BY A SISTER. she was dragging up what was being past of xanthous. THE SINS OF MY FUTURE. couldn't be about it and made ill. BUT I THINK WE GOT SET NOW AS I'M NOT TO BE DOING SUCH THINGS NO MORE.
terezi, the sister truth living here by me, came abouts apologetic. FORGAVE OF COURSE. wasn't a thing up at all. STILL, SHE THINKS BEST HER LEAVE. wish she wouldn't. WISH SHE'D STAY. promised she could leave and i would bide by it. WOULD WAIT. tears at me some but such as things go.
XANTHOUS, MY BROTHER. he has sought ammend of his own soul. HE HAS RETURNED HIS SCARS OF OLD AND MADE NEW OF THEM. a macabre sort but. AS AM I. as are we. HE SEEMS HAPPIER OF THEM AND SO I ALSO.
i have sought to keep peace within the meadous here. I HAVE MADE ABOUTS MYSELF TO ACTING LIASON WHERE I MAY NEED. perhaps i ain't best suited. PERHAPS IT ALL SOMETHING MUCH. but i wanted, i suppose. I WANT THIS.
it has made me think of the signless. IT HAS MADE ME MISS HIM ALSO. but not only for that.
I DID SOMETHING. zephyr blessed many an amiphimemorial upon our lot the winter passed. MERE TOUCH AND ALL SO MANY A THING RETURNED. understand for some and all it was different. WOULD'VE ANTICIPATED A HARSHNESS CERTAIN HAD I KNOWN. should've got to guess.
YET IN MY MIND A MEMORY. my self spread the fuck through in briefest taste. I SOUGHT MORE, DID I. my brother. ME. us and we making up for one. I REMEMBERED, SISTER. in recollection before me lay beforus.
OH TEREZI. it was beautiful. A MOTHER FUCKIN MIRACLE UNDENIABLE. i recalled us all. TWELVE AS YOURS WAS TWELVE. friends as you all were friends. AND A PEACE. dear meulin. MY MOIRAIL. was so different then. SUCH A STRANGE SENSE IT BRINGS. to be fit together yet missing too all the same. PERHAPS SIMILAR IN SENSE OF BEING BITTERSWEET.
similar in view of stars above. ALL CAME TOGETHER RECENT, TALE AND IMAGE FOR ZEPHYR TO MAKE OF THE SKY. meulin made a cat, warm and reminding of her. XANTHOUS GOT ABOUT HIM CURSE IN STARS ABOVE, BRINGING ALL HUMOR. i made a feath of stars. MADE SYMBOLIC ALL THEM WHAT HELPED ME. all them missed. ZEPHYR TOOK FAVOR, ME AND A BERTIE. i was gifted sleep free of daymare by way of wrist piece. A STAR WORN UPON ME. has allowed me to dream sweet it has, something done on never before.
I DREAMT OF OUR STARS, BACKWAYS OF THE CAPITOL. i dreamt of yours and of mine. I DREAMT US MEETING THERE. i dreamt us all but me and you particular. I HOPE TO SEE YOU THEN COME SUNRISE. or maybe after. CAN'T PAINT THE VIEW WITHOUT STAYING ON FOR IT, DON'T YOU KNOW.
pity you dearly.
KURLOZ. ♑
[A painted sunrise has been included. Terezi is featured by a familiar silhouette.]
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And then he'd thought about her and all what she might say. He thought about her getting mad. And so he walked off and forgot about writing for a little while. Then a longer while.
But now he's back and he's staring at the paper and he braces like it's going to hurt him, like it'll be his blood and not ink as is needed to work miracle upon the paper.]
mY WiCkEd sIsTeRTeReZi,I WaS DoInG AlL As wHaT YoU WaS AsKiNg, JuSt mInDiNg mY OwN OfF As fAr aS I CoUlD GeT, bUt tHeN ReAl rEcEnTlIkE, i wAs gEtTiNg tO Be wAkInG In tHiS PlAcE WhAt i aIn't wAsN'T SuPpOsEd tO Be bEiNg aT? aNd i fIgUrEd i oUgHt tO TeLl yOu bEcAuSe tHe sIsTeR As wHaT AiN'T NePeTa bUt iS BeInG HeR AnCeStOr gOt tElLiNg mE To. So, KnOw i'm aLl aBoUt gEtTiNg mY MoThErFuCkInG TeLl oN At yOu. ShE WaS KnOwInG AlL KiNdS Or mIrAcUlOuS ThInGs aS I WaSn't nEvEr tO Be kNoWiNg. ShE SaId sHe wAs bEiNg fRoM PaNeM ToO. aIn't tHaT AlL KiNdS Of mYsTiCaL HoW ThAt sHiT'S BeInG To wOrK?
AnYwAy, ShE WaS SaYiNg aS ThE MoThErFuCkEr yOu tOlD Me nOt tO Be sEeInG MiGhT WaNt tO Be sEeInG Me. I WaS LiKe, I CaN'T Be dOiNg tHaT, i aIn't bEiNg sUpPoSeD To bE. bUt tHeN ShE SaId hE WaS SaD AbOuT It aNd tHeN ShE GoT SaYiNg i sHoUlD TaLk tO YoU. aNd tHeN ThIs wAy tHiNgS Is mAyBe gEtTiNg tO AlL BeInG BeTtErLiKe. I HoPe sO. i wAnT To bE FrIeNdS AgAiN ReAl bAd, If tHaT'S OkAy wItH YoU.
EvErYoNe's rEaL NiCe hErE. i hOpE ThEy's bEiNg nIcE WhErE YoU'Re aT ToO. bEeN LoOkInG FoR A WaY As aLl tO KeEp yOu hApPy aS LiKe wHaT WaS WaNtEd oF YoU BuT I AiN'T FiGuReD It oUt yEt. I'M StIlL TrYiNg aT It.
Oh, AlSo, SiStEr sAiD FoR Me nOt tO Be eXpEcTiNg a lOt bUt i aIn't sUrE WhAt tHaT MeAnS ExAcT. iT'S A WhOlE LoT WhAt's hErE As i wAs nEvEr gEtTiNg eXpEcTaTiOnAl tO.
So, Uh, I'M GoNnA Be sEnDiNg tHiS At tO YoU NoW. hOnK.
- GaMzEe mAkArA ♑︎
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[a few weeks later, about mid-april]
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I don't exactly know how to start this. I'm not even sure you want to hear from me. I haven't written to you even if I've been for half a year. Six, seven months? Maybe 8. I haven't kept strict track. But I've had a lot to think about lately.
I hope you're alright. And happy. I'm doing alright. I'm better, I think. I've really had a lot to think about but i have people to talk to. Ini, I mean Izzekiel told me you were somewhere out there. I guess I'm just sending this letter into the void. Alfie says his friend found his wife out beyond our world and they write. So I figure this might get to you.
I'm not sure what to say. I like it here. I don't know if I should. I feel a little guilty for liking it here.
I sail. I sail everywhere in the ocean which is really not anywhere at all. There nothing to find but a weird creature. I think I might change that. I have friends. No family but it asks a lot to have family. I've found someone I like. Not love, but like, and that seems like enough.
I understand if you don't reply.
-Meulin Leijon